Whiskey in the pod

Glenlivet's new Scotch requires no glass, no ice and, frankly, makes no sense.

I have always been something of a whiskey fan (well, not always; I was, in fact, a toddler once).

But nothing compares to whiskey – from the sharp bite of Scotch to the smooth sweetness of American bourbon and the spiciness of rye, I love it all. And history will prove that I have, in fact, not been opposed to whiskey in various forms.

But this? This is too much.

Late last week, Scottish whisky brand The Glenlivet unveiled a new “innovation” in the field of whiskey.

The Glenlivet debuted its whiskey-in-a-pod concept on Twitter Oct. 3. The product isn’t available in retail, likely because we assume getting those approved would be regulatory hell. Instead, they’re a part of London Cocktail Week. Glenlivet has not said when they’ll be available outside of the U.K.

The capsules come in three varieties, which, according to The Glenlivet, are:

  • Citrus: blends vibrant bergamot, zesty grapefruit and almond with pepper and the creamy sweetness of The Glenlivet Founder’s Reserve (almonds?! Really?! Heck outa here).
  • Wood: combines The Glenlivet Founder’s Reserve with powerful woody notes of cedar, sandalwood and nutty oloroso (I don’t know what oloroso is, and I don’t care to).
  • Spice: blends the rich full bodied notes of The Glenlivet Founder’s Reserve with base note of vetiver, dark walnut bitter, leather and tobacco (okay, this one sounds good, pod me up).

The Glenlivet claims the packaging is “sustainable,” probably because you’re literally eating it. And while that does prompt weird images of your belly filling up with little fragments of plastic, it’s probably a more desirable alternative to all the glass I’ve swallowed while drinking whiskey over the years.

Oh, except I don’t swallow glass, because whiskey belongs in a damn glass.

In all seriousness, I’ll raise a glass (or, sigh, a pod) to The Glenlivet. The sheer amount of earned media from these capsules is probably enough to let their marketing department take a few weeks off. As negative as the reaction has been to this “innovation,” (with many comparing it to the bizarre eat-a-Tide-Pod challenge that’s been consuming kids these days) that hasn’t stopped digital news outlets ’round the world from writing stories filled with interviews from whiskey experts to get their reaction.

On that note, seemingly no media outlet has thought to ask Glenlivet: Is this even real? Are the pods part of a bigger strategy? Or was it just some high-level trolling?

Frankly, I’m more comfortable not knowing. Cheers.